just trying to find these little things in this life and the next one, those small irrationalities, or misplaced and mispelled catch phrases, tiny indsicretions that had you running and falling on that day to day
And, of course, that is what all of this is - all of this: the one song, ever changing, ever reincarnated, that speaks somehow from and to and for that which is ineffable within us and without us, that is both prayer and deliverance, folly and wisdom, that inspires us to dance or smile or simply to go on, senselessly, incomprehensibly, beatifically, in the face of mortality and the truth that our lives are more ill-writ, ill-rhymed and fleeting than any song, except perhaps those songs - that song, endlessly reincarnated - born of that truth, be it the moon and June of that truth, or the wordless blue moan, or the rotgut or the elegant poetry of it. That nameless black-hulled ship of Ulysses, that long black train, that Terraplane, that mystery train, that Rocket ‘88’, that Buick 6 - same journey, same miracle, same end and endlessness.
Shall Death reign the lord of the soul, Shall the dust be the ultimate goal— I will storm the black bastions of Night! I will tread where my vision has trod, I will set in the darkness a light, In the vastness, a god. (x)
Here’s some of my relatives right here. Man, I think they’ve changed a lot since back then. From the most violent folk to the most peacefully content with their socialism, or communism if your from America.
Driven by romantic, spiritual, and medicinal imperatives, the author goes in search of something everyone tells him no longer exists: an opium den. From Hong Kong to Bangkok to the Golden Triangle, he is offered every decadence known to the East—and learns the truth about the perfect drug.
Been reading his book about Country, and Rock and Roll and it is damn fine and crazy. Just the way I like it.
Been feeling a lot like this most recently. Been feeling somewhat down in the dumps you could say. Worked about Fifty Hours last week and it was hard on the old grind you could say. Pondering on wither to go to Texas or not again because my Grandmother’s health is not so well. Pondering on the state of my electronic books because I just bought another E reader after months and months of deliberation, ‘cause I’m so picky and ‘cause I’m switching from a Kindle after so much deliberation, ‘cause Gutenberg told me to do so, but really I just wanted to buy something with my money ‘cause it make me feel good to buy something and I’m totally confused on the state of reading and writing and arithmetic at the moment. Got my DNA tested recently, didn’t really find out that much, other than I’m really White like I thought before I did it, but I’m curious and It’s interesting but a real inexact science that is for sure, expecting a little more exactitude from it, just got that I’m 95 percent North European, which I figured anyways, but it’s cool to see a bunch of people whom you are related to out there in the world that you didn’t know to begin with like some Norwegian hacker living in Sweden, like some guy from A Girl with a Dragon Tattoo, sitting in his underwear trying to hack in my bank account with his skinny pale girlfriend on her obsolete PDA, but it’s interesting. The weather turns cold, then hot, and then cold, but at least it’s not snowing as in some places, because pretty much tired of all of that, but pretty much tired just in general I guess, sitting on my porch with a fiddle in my hand, and a bottle of booze on my knee, looking like a portrait of the Nineteenth Century you could say. Out.
There is little that does not disappear into the past. The ability to think, as abilities go, is just like any other. Constant relation between being and nothingness. The relation to the void. I opened an ossuary and saw the bones, a little box where tibias rested next to the skull. A gray…
This quote kind of reminds me of the show I was watching tonight on HBO. That one with Woody and Matthew Mcdude. They were at a Revival and McDude’s character was going on about the idiocy of religion and nothingness that is his cynical character, but it was interesting. I think they got good chemistry and I like the show. Some Southern Gothic with a little bit of mystery. Not too bad.
I got back from Canada where snow was everywhere and idyllic small towns where kids were ice skating in parks and everybody was happy and serene and snow was piled up on sidewalk like a mile high to Atlanta. Oh I am so tired of snow and ice. I didn’t leave my house this time. I didn’t venture outside. I didn’t enjoy the snow like my Mom and take idyllic pictures of our ice drenched house because I already had enough of all that. I waited in line at Kroger to get some supplies. I watched the Olympics where it was warmer there than it was here. I have to admit I’m sick of it all. Go snow where the sun don’t shine.
and on another note R.I.P. Mr. Hoffman. I think I liked him best in the 25th hour and Capote, but it’s hard to narrow it down because he was in a bunch of good films. Everybody has demons and sometimes it consumes you, but he gave the good while he was here. A damn good character actor, and going to be missed.
I’m going to Canada to see my girlfriend. I do want to go because we couldn’t get together for Christmas but at the same time I don’t want to see any more snow like for the rest of my life and junk. But naw, they know how to handle it up there. I once flew back from there in what I would consider a blizzard and that was like normal stuff up there. The workers were trudging around in like a foot of snow and I was like a couldn’t deal with that, but hopefully their won’t be any blizzards and I might actually get to visit a Maple Sugar Farm so that will be cool, everybody does it up there, so just along with it.
I tried to go around the corner and go to the grocery store. and there was this guy walking in the snow in the middle of my subdivision. I thought that was weird. Didn’t think nothing of it as my car plodded along and I about hit him as he laughed at me and told me to roll down my window. “You’re not going anywhere. You might as well turn around and go home.” as I saw he had a Walgreen’s bag in his hand and that place is like a couple of miles away. “You just walked up to the Pharmacy” and he said he had to get something. as I drove up there to the road and saw some junk like those pictures and then I just turned around and went back home and was trapped in my house for the day. Till I have to get out and go to work tomorrow. Oh the joy.